Fears of repeating past relationships

I have just started reading your theories and I am very interested in where to start my journey. I have been a “single mom” for years now and I am ready to enlarge my family. I have a successful career, I work out and music is my passion. However, I am alone at night in bed, with my emptiness. I am worried I will repeat my same path in love, and I wonder if that is subconsciously making it come true. I feel alone, when I know I am not. I am surrounded by life’s most amazing friends and family, yet I cannot seem to find peace and happiness in the one area of my life. As I get older, and more independent I am searching for answers to what path I am supposed to follow. My life is full of love and joy and I feel inner turmoil emotionally when it comes to relationships. Everyone has words of wisdom for me, yet they all contradict each other, adding to my confusion. I would like a starting point, a recommended book to start my journey.